How to Beat Anxiety & Depression For Good!  When Traditional Stuff Doesn’t Work

Do you watch other women nailing it as moms while your life looks like a hamster on a wheel, going nowhere fast?  As a mom that struggled with depression and anxiety, I know that all you need is one small breakthrough and you can be a Wonderfully Optimistic Warrior Mom like no other.  From experience, I understand how important it is to overcome this especially when the world is telling you that it’s a mental issue and medications and traditional therapy are not working.  That is why this blog post will share how to beat anxiety and depression for good!  When traditional stuff doesn’t work. 

The Problem with the Mental Illness Diagnosis

“Finally, someone can tell me what’s wrong with me!!”  That sense of relief was wonderful when the diagnosis came that feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, and guilty as sh*t wasn’t my fault.  It wasn’t my fault that I was this imperfect mom.  The overwhelm, exhaustion and guilt were all because of anxiety and depression.  Now, all I have to do is take medication and go to therapy and can feel like myself again.  I can be the awesome mom I want to be to my youngsters.

WRONG!!

That sense of relief faded quicker than the diagnosis.  Suddenly, overwhelm, exhaustion, and guilt came flooding in as fast as Hurricane Katrina.  Destruction and chaos were what it left.  You see if medication and therapy didn’t work for me and it was “supposed” to work.  Then, “what the hell was wrong with me”?  Was I really just broken, messed up, and not worthwhile like I had been told for so many years? 

Giving up seemed so easy at this point.  But one thing life had taught me was that easy was not in the cards for me.  So, giving up was not an option.  What did I do instead?  My defiant soul, my need to defy the odds, kicked in and led the way to an insane discovery that answered my questions.  The questions as to why medications and traditional therapy didn’t work for me.  You see, the problem with the mental health diagnosis is that it’s only partially true.

A Better Explanation of Anxiety and Depression

Let me provide a better explanation of anxiety and depression.  Anxiety and depression DO exist in the mind.  But not ONLY in the mind.  

It also exists in the body.  You likely already know this because migraines, fatigue, digestive issues, and so many other physical ailments happen as a result.  Why does this happen if anxiety and depression are only mental illnesses?  Oh, wait…it’s a resulting effect of anxiety and depression correct?

What if anxiety and depression affect the mind as a resulting effect of something else?

Let me ask you.  Could it be possible that anxiety and depression are symptoms of something that exists at a deeper level?  If anxiety and depression are the resulting effects because there is an underlying issue that exists in the core of who you are, in your soul.   What if this is where depression and anxiety begin?  

AHA!!

That is why the medications and traditional therapy are not helping you overcome anxiety and depression.  It is the reason why it only provides temporary relief.  The treatment is only providing relief to one part of the problem.  A better approach using a better explanation of anxiety and depression would be a holistic approach.  

That is why you feel like you are on the hamster wheel and life is going nowhere fast.  You have only been provided with a way to manage your symptoms.  What you need is a way to beat anxiety and depression for good!

You Are Not Broken or Trapped or The Problem

Now, do me a favor and take a deep breath.  Revealing that the issue exists deep within you, at your core, isn’t a bad thing.  I remember what I felt when I realized this truth.  You are likely thinking, “great, I’m the problem”.  NO!  The mental health diagnosis is the reason why you feel broken and trapped.  Society is the problem.  Influences are the problem.  Because when nothing works you believe you are broken and trapped.  But, the truth is that if the issue exists within you then the solution exists within you too.  It’s time to take back your control of what’s going on!

Let’s get down to the problem.  Ready?

The problem is that there is a massive disconnection in your life.  Actually, there are two disconnections that have occurred.  The first is the disconnection from your soul.  The soul is where your personality comes from, who you are.  Throughout life, you tend to be influenced into believing who you “should” be and how you “should feel about important values.  You also grow and develop with life lessons.  When you become a mom this happens more so.  And when you add on the busyness of mom life you barely have any time to even realize who you are now.  

It is super important to be able to take some time for self-reflection.  Get to know and understand who you are.  Gain some clarity about what you truly believe in and be proud of who you are.  Everyone has a unique purpose to fulfill that is separate from your salary or career choice and if you deny that for yourself you become vulnerable to depression and anxiety.  A moment to appreciate where you’ve been, where you are, and where you are going is critical.  

The second massive disconnection is between your soul and your spirit.  Yes, they are different.  Your spirit is the direct line to a powerhouse of energy.  It is your lighthouse in the storm.  The direct line to the Universe, God, whatever you decide to call it.  It is necessary to overcome and be successful in this life, especially as a mom.  

You see, depression and anxiety create so much chaos and confusion that you don’t even realize the moment you lost either one of these connections.  The great news is that you can reestablish this connection.  But it is a process and it must be followed correctly.  Because I believe at some point and time you knew this.  You may have tried to establish the connection on your own.  But if not done in order, it can lead to more frustration and overwhelm and destruction of hope.

The Entire Process Matters

Have you ever tried to do something out of order and end up having to start all over?  It’s usually when you realize how the entire process matters, especially the order of it.  When it comes to how to beat anxiety and depression this couldn’t be more of a fact.

I have two dogs, two pit bulls, Hercules and Styx.  Love them to pieces but sometimes they can be like youngsters.  They can get into trouble.  It had been a while and I hadn’t given them a bath.  So I decided today would be the perfect day to get them cleaned up.  I take them upstairs and take them a bath.  Well, Ms. Styx hates water.  So as I struggle to get Styx in the bath, Hercules is watching me and thinks I’m playing so he hops out and now I’m just having playtime instead of bathtime with these two.  Finally, I get them in and get them washed up and smelling good and dried.  Huge win for the day!

Silly me, I didn’t let them out for the day.  So I have a serious discussion with them about how I’m gonna let them out but really quick to use the bathroom and right back in they have to come.  I let them out.  My phone rings and I end up having a longer conversation than expected.  When I realize the dogs are still outside I run out and find them digging and full of dirt.  Oh jeez.  What a waste of time that was.

Can’t leave them like that in the house.  So, I take them both a quick bath again.  Huge sigh of relief and on with my day.  Guess what happens.  It rains!  Out of all days, today it decides to rain, and not early in the day or right after I let them out to play.  It rains at the end of the day right before the last time they get to go out.  Again, they are wet and dirty and smelly.  What a waste of time and energy even though I couldn’t help but laugh at how I was so unprepared for all of it.

Trying to beat anxiety and depression as a mental issue alone is like me taking my two pit bulls a bath without being prepared for the unexpected but very real situations that might happen.  You end up trying to achieve a great result but doing everything in the wrong order and having to restart over and over and feeling like a failure, a complete waste of time.

Can you see any way that I could have simplified the bathing process for my two pitties?  Do you think that the entire process matters?

The Entire Process Breakdown

Well here’s the entire process breakdown of how to beat anxiety and depression for good.  

Step #1.  Embrace Yourself Phase

Embrace who you are now.  Be flawsome!  Appreciate your journey from the very beginning.  Know yourself at a very intimate level.  Embrace yourself and yes there are places for you to develop.  But this stage is only a dating yourself phase.

Step #2.  Emerge Uniquely Phase

After you connect with yourself and you can embrace who you are.  The next step is to let the world meet you.  It is time to be brilliant, bold, and beautiful and share it with your family and everyone around you.  This phase is a phase where you will have to be very patient and kind to yourself.  Take it slowly.  Perhaps you remember you love to write, paint, or dance.  Write something to your youngsters or dance with them or show them a painting you drew.  Or share it on social media.  One thing at a time and before you know it you will be comfier allowing others to see you.  

Step #3.  Expand Your Limits Phase

As you gain confidence, you can take a moment to appreciate it.  However, don’t get too comfy here.  You have connected to your authentic, genuine self.  You have to take advantage of the momentum you are creating.  The energy has to keep flowing positively.  It is time to open the connection to your spirit.  Life challenges are not going to stop during this time and they can wreak havoc on your progress.  

You must now explore and expand your limits. 

I can hear you moaning and groaning 🙂  I get it, I’m asking for more when you’ve already given so much.  But in all fairness, you’re a mom – you know you are capable of giving more.  Just make sure to connect to your spirit.  You know that voice that encourages you.  The one that you tuned out because you thought they sounded like your two-year-old with no clue about life and nothing but hope and vision.

Listen to it and connect to it.  Also, connecting with a community of like-minded moms will help you phase into your next step.  Energy is contagious.  Keep building positive energy.

Step #4.  Evolve into Your W.O.W.

As you build and strengthen your connection with your spirit and your soul, the way you live will change.  You may not even notice it at first.  That is why I recommend journaling and once a week or once a month go back and read your entries.  You will notice fewer and fewer negative-filled days.  Now, you can even use this moment to create what I like to call a tantrum battle plan strategy.  This is where you find a better way to handle tough challenges.  Overcome depression and anxiety by creating this and calling out on these moments for what they are.

Step #5.  Empower Your Wonderfully Optimistic Warrior Mom  

You are in control more than you know.  Give yourself credit and reach your mommy empowerment.  Empower your W.O.W. and start living life energetically alive and fiercely free to love yourself and love being a mom!!  Struggling to survive the fierce battle of depression and anxiety daily is not what’s in store for you anymore.  Let that shxt go!

What’s Next?

Implementation.  Go get it done.  If it gets challenging along the way or if you would like some guidance on detailed implementation a good idea would be to subscribe and become part of the W.O.W. Mom Society.  You can also click the link below for a 30-day challenge to start building that momentum 🙂

Until next time! Remember, you matter to me!